The Effects Of Parental Divorce On Adult Children's Romantic Relationships

Introduction

Beginning in the 1960's and 1970's, divorce rates rose dramatically, and in the process many children of divorce were created. Since that time, many studies have examined the effects of divorce on these children. Among other things, these studies have found that children of divorce experience an enormous sense of loss, often show mild depressive symptoms, and are more likely to engage in delinquent and antisocial activities. While these particular effects are detected mostly in childhood in the years immediately following the divorce, another disturbing finding extends into adulthood. Adult children of divorce have higher divorce rates than adults with parents in stable marriages. Recent research has dealt with the causes behind these statistics.

Recent Research On the Relationships Of Adult Children Of Divorce

A study by Franklin, Janoff-Bulman, and Roberts (1990) examined the long-term impact of parental divorce on beliefs about the self and others. University students filled out questionnaires that dealt with their assumptions about others and themselves and also on their levels of trust in others. The findings indicated that adult children of divorce are less optimistic about their own future success with marriage. They also report less trust of their future spouse. For some better news, those who believed in the benevolence of others were more optimistic about marriage. The researchers remarked that children of divorce focus their opinions of marriage on the roles of others, rather than themselves like those from intact homes. Those with divorced parents realized "that some marriages do end; being a fine, worthy person oneself is not a guarantee of marital success, and marriage is not a guarantee of trust between partners, but an interdependent venture that might fail."

Johnston and Thomas (1996) surveyed undergraduate students in intimate dating relationships who were from both intact or divorced families. The surveys assessed whether children of divorce perceived their present relationships to be risky and if they were less trusting of their partners than those from intact families. Their results show that children of divorce share negative attributes that could hurt an intimate relationship. Those from divorced homes trust their partners less than those from intact homes. Another interesting finding was that anyone from a family with high parental conflict, whether divorced or not, perceived their own relationship as a high risk.

Weber, Orbuch, and House (1995) focused their study on adults who were in their first marriages. The respondents were asked about their family backgrounds as children (who they lived with at different ages and the reasons that they did not live with both parents at any time during childhood) They were also asked to rate the levels of happiness and stability in their own marriages. The researchers found that among adults in less than very happy marriages, those with divorced parents had higher divorce rates. They also found that children of divorce in unhappy marriages were more likely to have straining patterns of interaction with their spouse. Children of divorce were also more likely to think their marriage was in trouble.

Glenn and Kramer (1987) pooled data from 11 U.S. national surveys conducted from 1973 to 1985 to test for the strength of various arguments of reasons for a higher divorce rate among adult children of divorce. Those theories that the statistics lent support to were inappropriate modeling of spouse roles (bad marriage provides a bad model for children), inadequate social control (less parental support throughout the marriage), absence of modeling of spouse roles (inability to observe the parent in any spousal role), lower educational attainment (those from broken homes are less likely to pursue higher education, and people with less education are more likely to divorce), greater willingness to resort to divorce (moral stigma of divorce is lower and they are more willing to make divorce an option to end conflict), and lower age of marriage (people from broken homes marry earlier, and people who marry earlier are more likely to divorce).

Conclusion

The higher rates of divorce in adult children of divorce seem to stem from pessimistic behavior and attitudes acquired from living in a family of high parental conflict and from living in a broken home. Many reasons could account for the lower levels of trust and poorer skills for dealing well with conflict with a future or present spouse. Some of the theories behind the pessimism include the lack of an appropriate role model for a good marriage and a greater willingness to let divorce become an option for dealing with marital conflict. With these results in mind, the divorce rates of adult children of divorce might be lowered through finding good models, raising levels of trust, and finding methods of solving conflict other than divorce. Perhaps further studies on the qualities of long-lasting marriages of people with divorced parents will lend more help to those struggling with this issue.

References

Franklin, K.M., Janoff-Bulman, R., & Roberts, J. E. (1990). Long-term impact of parental divorce on optimism and trust: changes in general assumptions or narrow beliefs. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 59, 743-755.

Glenn, N. D., & Kramer, K. (1987). The marriages and divorces of the children of divorce. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 44, 335-347.

Johnston, S. G., & Thomas, A. M. (1996). Divorce versus intact parental marriage and perceived risk and dyadic trust in present heterosexual relationships. Psychological Reports, 78, 387-390.

Orbuch, T. L., House J. S. (1995). Effects of childhood family background on adult marital quality and perceived stability. American Journal of Sociology, 101, 404-432.

Contributed by Noelle Wood, December 2, 1997.

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